It is a common cliché heard by mothers: “You certainly have your hands full!” Sometimes it’s said as a well-meaning acknowledgment of the mother’s work; sometimes it’s a fallback exclamation when interacting with a mother in her natural habitat of chaos, and sometimes it’s said with an eyebrow raise and a disapproving glance. When out in public with children, mothers often receive some (mostly) well-meaning observation or advice. Mary, Mother of God, was also a recipient of an unsolicited observation, as the Bible has preserved for us in the Gospel of Luke:

“Then Simeon blessed them and said to Mary, his mother: ‘This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be spoken against, so that the thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your own soul too.” (Luke 2:34-35)

A sword would pierce her soul. That was the revelation that Mary received while presenting Jesus at the temple. It is a far cry from the clichés we hear today. It was a direct prophecy, to be fulfilled throughout the life of Mary as the Mother of God. It is also the “First Sorrow” of the Seven Sorrows of Mary, which leads us to consider her Our Lady of Sorrows.

The Seven Sorrows of Mary both unite us to her humanity and distinguish her as uniquely blessed to carry such burdens with grace. They are reminders that Mary’s maternal suffering did not begin with the crucifixion of Christ; rather, that her love for Jesus was interwoven with suffering throughout His earthly life. 

The first sorrow, The Prophecy of Simeon, is the source of the imagery of Our Lady of Sorrows: Mary is holding her Immaculate Heart, which has been pierced by seven swords. Her expression is solemn, accepting, and sorrowful. Mary had gone to the temple with Jesus, as was the custom, forty days after His birth. Modern mothers are still being showered with compliments and congratulations in the months after their baby is born, but the words God had for Mary through Simeon were clear: she would uniquely suffer with Christ. The new baby she cradled at the Temple could not be protected by her love.

To those who have looked into the face of their child, helpless to ease their pain: Mary, Our Lady of Sorrows, is with you.

The Second Sorrow of Mary is The Flight into Egypt. In the Gospel of Matthew, we hear: “When they had gone, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream. ‘Get up,’ he said, ‘take the child and his mother and escape to Egypt. Stay there until I tell you, for Herod is going to search for the child to kill him.’ So he got up, took the child and his mother during the night, and left for Egypt.” (Matthew 3:13-14)

Three hundred and fifty miles. A child under two years old. The certain knowledge that His life was in danger. These were the circumstances that Mary had to mother in during Jesus’ early life. Still comforting Him, still entertaining Him, still being the sure lap of love can withstand any trial - all while being pierced by a sword of uncertainty.

To those who have been worried and afraid for the safety of your children or for the provision of their next meal: Mary, Our Lady of Sorrows, is with you.

The Third Sorrow of Mary is The Loss of Jesus in the Temple. Luke 2:41-50 recounts the Holy Family’s customary visit to the Temple when Jesus was twelve years old. Traveling with a large group and assuming Jesus was with them, it was a day before Mary and Joseph frantically realized He was not there. It was three days before they found him, still in the temple, learning from the teachers there. Every parent can relate to Mary (though perhaps not her calm demeanor) when she says to Jesus: “…Son, why have you treated us like this? Your father and I have been anxiously searching for you.” (Luke 2:48)

To those who have felt the fear of losing a child, who have screamed their name in a crowded store; who have had to describe height and hair color and try to remember what mismatched outfit their child haphazardly put on that morning: Mary, Our Lady of Sorrows, is with you.

The Fourth Sorrow is Mary Meets Jesus on the Way to Calvary. Tradition notes that Mary would have been in Jerusalem for the Passover. She would have helped to prepare a Passover meal and been united with loved ones, not necessarily understanding that the time for her Son to fulfill the prophecies was at hand. She would have rushed to the Via Dolorosa, as the one most dear to her heart was being tormented and degraded as He walked toward His death. Tradition holds that a silent gaze was passed between mother and Son, enveloping all the love and suffering a soul can bear.

To those who have watched their children mocked, hurt, or unfairly punished; who have had to stand by, unable to reach out to comfort them: Mary, Our Lady of Sorrows, is with you.

The Fifth Sorrow of Mary is The Crucifixion and Death of Jesus. The Gospel of John recounts Mary at the foot of the Cross: "When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her, ‘Woman, here is your son,’ and to the disciple, ‘Here is your mother.’ From that time on, the disciple took her into his home.” (John 19:26-27)

Then Mary watched as “…Jesus said, ‘I am thirsty.’ A jar of wine vinegar was there, so the soaked a sponge in it, put the sponge on a stalk of the hyssop plant, and lifted it to Jesus’ lips. When he had received the drink, Jesus said, ‘It is finished.’ With that, He bowed His head and gave up His Spirit.” (John 19:28-30)

It’s commonly said that a mother should never have to bury a child. They should be the witnesses of the first breath, not the last. Yet here is the Mother of God, unexempt from this deepest piercing of the soul.

To those who have had time stand still as you wonder how life can go on when the life you created cannot: Mary, Our Lady of Sorrows, is with you.

The Sixth Sorrow of Mary is Jesus is Taken Down from the Cross. Both Mark 15:40-47 and John 19:31-37 describe Jesus’ preparation for burial after being taken down from the cross. Michelangelo’s “Pieta” is carved from the emotion of what that moment might have been like for Mary. To hold her Son one last time - whether she was able to do it physically or only spiritually - was a sword to her heart. A last touch, a final prayer, while in His presence - once again, love and sorrow not separating for the Mother of God.

To those who have held your lifeless child in your arms; those who have been given only the comfort of whispering prayers to their souls as they make their way to heaven: Mary, Our Lady of Sorrows, is with you.

The Seventh Sorrow of Mary is the Burial of Jesus. From cross-referencing Gospel accounts, we believe that Mary was among those who came from Galilee to the tomb: “The women who had come from Galilee with him followed behind, and when they had seen the tomb and the way in which His body was laid in it, they returned and prepared spices and perfumed oils.” (Luke 23:55-56)

Jesus had been quickly prepared for burial due to the impending Sabbath, and the women who came to His tomb planned to return after that time to properly complete the burial rituals. I wonder if it gave them some relief, this way of serving Him even after His death. I wonder what it was like to walk away from the tomb. Yes, they would return to discover the Risen Christ - but in the deepest, piercing sorrow of Mary, there was only the finality of a burial and a broken body.

To those who have had to summon the courage to return to a life without the life they created; those who have said a final goodbye to their child only to spend the rest of their own lives preparing for the glory of a heavenly reunion: Mary, Our Lady of Sorrows, is with you.

The Seven Sorrows of Mary take us deeper into understanding how our humanity encounters the life of Christ. Always pointing to Him, Our Lady of Sorrows walks with us as one who has been there before and reminds us that loving Him deeply does not spare us from suffering greatly; but it does promise a triumphant Resurrection.

To all who are walking through the piercing sorrows of life: Mary, Our Lady of Sorrows, is with you.

Prayer to Our Lady of Sorrows

O most holy Virgin,
Mother of our Lord Jesus Christ,
Queen of Martyrs,
whose soul was pierced by the sword of sorrow foretold by Simeon,
I come before you with humility and love.
O Sorrowful Mother,
I unite my sufferings with yours,
and I ask you to offer them to your Son, Jesus Christ,
for the salvation of souls and the glory of God.
Teach me to accept my crosses with patience,
to trust in God's holy will,
and to remain faithful in times of trial and sorrow.
Obtain for me true repentance for my sins,
a heart filled with compassion,
and the grace to persevere in faith, hope, and charity until the end of my life.
Comfort all who are afflicted,
strengthen the sick,
console the grieving,
protect our families,
and lead sinners back to the loving mercy of your Son.
O Mother of Sorrows,
never let me be separated from Jesus.
Stand beside me in every difficulty,
especially at the hour of my death,
and lead me safely to the eternal joy of heaven.
Our Lady of Sorrows, pray for us.
Amen.